soul searching
I know it's been a quick minute since I’ve updated this blog. The last few months, I’ve been thinking about writing quite often, but each time I sit down to write, I find myself in an introspective battle---
Do I have something worthwhile to contribute to this community or is it self-indulgent fluff? How do I balance authenticity and privacy? Am I just another superficial voice contributing to the cacophony of the internet or can I actually going to help someone in some way? Is this a distraction from being present to my family or a worthwhile avocation? How seriously should I take my responsibility as a citizen of the internet i.e. what kinds of things should I be talking about in this space? What will it all come to years from now when I’m gone? What’s the point of EVERYTHING!?!
Maybe I’m overly complicating things. Putting words down in black and white is easy. But presenting authenticity requires a little more digging than sharing pictures from our latest adventures. Perhaps it’s because I believe so strongly in the power of the Truth Sayers and Life Givers that the gravity of it all puts me into a reverie of self doubt.
Which is all to say...I’d like to be more honest (not that I wasn’t before) and intentional here but I’m not really sure what that quite looks like yet. I have a really difficult time with vulnerability both online and offline but I'd really like to break through that and hold space for something a little more meaty than travel pics and recipes (though I'll still probably share those too).
Believe me, I know that's it not easy to talk about the hard stuff, the dark stuff, the ugly stuff, the isolating stuff. But its in the middle of those dragon caves that we explore our human nature and heal our collective brokenness. I hope that with a little more vulnerability, we can all feel a little more connected in the real world and out.
Do I have something worthwhile to contribute to this community or is it self-indulgent fluff? How do I balance authenticity and privacy? Am I just another superficial voice contributing to the cacophony of the internet or can I actually going to help someone in some way? Is this a distraction from being present to my family or a worthwhile avocation? How seriously should I take my responsibility as a citizen of the internet i.e. what kinds of things should I be talking about in this space? What will it all come to years from now when I’m gone? What’s the point of EVERYTHING!?!
Maybe I’m overly complicating things. Putting words down in black and white is easy. But presenting authenticity requires a little more digging than sharing pictures from our latest adventures. Perhaps it’s because I believe so strongly in the power of the Truth Sayers and Life Givers that the gravity of it all puts me into a reverie of self doubt.
Which is all to say...I’d like to be more honest (not that I wasn’t before) and intentional here but I’m not really sure what that quite looks like yet. I have a really difficult time with vulnerability both online and offline but I'd really like to break through that and hold space for something a little more meaty than travel pics and recipes (though I'll still probably share those too).
Believe me, I know that's it not easy to talk about the hard stuff, the dark stuff, the ugly stuff, the isolating stuff. But its in the middle of those dragon caves that we explore our human nature and heal our collective brokenness. I hope that with a little more vulnerability, we can all feel a little more connected in the real world and out.
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| This is my natural face. No make up or editing. Just me and my anxiety holding on for dear life while Husbando drives in Ireland for he first time. Its my "this is probably a bad idea, but lets try anyway" face. |
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